Not Power Over, But Simple Freedom

Was reading the latest post today over at The Rational Male on “Building A Better Beta” and one particular quote hit me:

It’s very important that the vision you have of being a “better Man” originates with YOU, not with the idealisms of a plugged in moralist or women so fearful of your new awareness that they’ll make concerted efforts to supplant it with what makes you a better servant of their insecure imperative.

How true. And I think the biggest fear most feminists have of all of this stuff we’re trying to figure out in the “manosphere” (something I only tentatively agree to associate with, at this point) is that we’ll somehow shift (back?) into what they’ve railed against from the start of their movement: patriarchal power over women. It still remains to be seen where any clear evidence of this conscious, conspiratorial banding together eons ago actually took place, but I leave that series of arguments to others of our ilk much more informed on the subject.

Yet, unfortunately, there are most likely many, many men who get into this “personal work,” for lack of a better term, as a means to avoid transcending their issues with women and “get back” at them. Yes, this probably means they’re seeking “power over.”

But as I reflect on my fundamental reason for diving into all of this stuff, back when I first serendipitously and fortuitously stumbled across The Game and The Way of the Superior Man within two weeks of one another, it was never about getting back, getting even, or learning manipulation to serve the attainment of an uneven power dynamic.

It was simply that I craved autonomy. Simple freedom… in the presence of physical beauty for which I knew there was no rational reason for my heart to race, throat to tighten, and mind to freeze. I became obsessed with overcoming this nasty, ridiculous knee-jerk response that comes from hell knows where in my genetics or my psyche or wherever. It doesn’t matter, really.

What matters is that I have this drive to learn more about myself, about women, about sexual dynamics, about manhood, all of it, in order to find freedom, on my own terms. Yes, Mr. Tomassi, I accept the challenge. Thanks for a great post…

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